Thursday, January 13, 2011

Mooky

This is my dog, Mooky.  He is breaking my heart.

I adopted Mooky from UC when my second year of tech school was coming to an end in 1999.  He was bred for research; born in a lab and sold to UC for the Veterinary Technology program.  Every student was assigned an animal (either a cat or a dog) to adopt or place in a home by the end of the school year.  I was assigned a cat, but I traded with another student for Mooky.  I knew I wanted to have a dog of my own since Mark and I were engaged to be married that year, and we would be moving into our first apartment after the wedding.  It was an exciting time!

None of the animals had names, they were addressed by their tattoos.  I remember going to the meet "CKKMDS" for the first time.  All of the male dogs were housed in a room together and when you walked in, the barking would literally make the hearing in your ears distort.  As an added bonus, the smell of urine & feces would also smack you in the face, making visiting the dogs a lot less appealing...  When I saw his face, I remember thinking, "Wow, that dog has REALLY big eyes!"  He was very timid, he paced his cage and moved to the back when I entered.  He wanted to come to me, but was too afraid.  I would offer him a treat, but he was too scared to take it.  There I sat, deaf and about to wretch from the stink, trying to win over this silly-looking dog.

Our relationship didn't change much the whole time I was in school.  He would wag his tail when he saw me after awhile, but he never made eye contact with me, never ate from my hand, and never seemed to pay me much attention when he was out of his cage.  I remember taking Mark down there to meet him; he was trying to get Mooky to look at him or acknowledge him in some way-nothing.

I was so excited for the day I finally got to bring him home in May of 1999.  My mother-in-law, Judie, went down to UC to help me.  He walked out of his cage for the last time, walked out of the basement of the medical school for the last time, and walked out into the world for the first time-COMPLETELY freaked out.  Mooky had never been outside due to research regulations, so he was experiencing everything for the first time.  The sound of cars driving by, construction equipment beeping, people walking by, grass, etc.-it was all new to him.  

I took him home and began to watch a 2 1/2 year old dog learn how to do everything for the first time.  He would go outside to go to the bathroom when a lawn mower would start up, and he would sprint to my side.  He had no idea how to climb stairs.  He would barely eat.  One thing he was sure of:  he could not let me out of his sight because I was all he knew.  If I left him, he freaked out 'til I got back.  He was petrified of men and wouldn't approach them at all, no matter what.

Then, things started to change...  Mooky began to calm down and trust people.  He learned to play and run in the yard like a normal dog.

Mooky is 14 years old, now.  He started out so weird, but has turned into the dog that I will compare all other dogs to.  He is usually present in the background of most of the pictures of the kids, he loves to be around us.  He is so sweet, he wants nothing more than to lay with me and have me rub his chest.  He has endured two kids pulling his tail, yanking his ears, feeding him one kernel of food at a time from his dog bowl, and countless loud noises that caused him to run and hide.  Sure, he has his annoying habits, but I couldn't ask for a better dog.

That's why I'm so sad.  I had my suspicions that Mooky was sick, but it was confirmed this week.  He has stage III/IV chronic renal failure.  Kidney disease causes him to vomit, drink more water, and pee more.  We are still in the beginning stages of trying to figure everything out, so right now I have more questions than answers.  I have no idea if this will progress quickly-it depends on him.  In 2 weeks I will take him in for more blood work to see if the change in diet has helped any.  Today, he has vomited about 6 times, which I'm hoping is from the antibiotic he was on.  If not, it might mean that the disease is starting to progress.

 I know I'm going to have to say goodbye to him someday and I will never be able to replace him.  He has given me so much unconditional love in the past 11 years, I just hope that I have made him as happy as he has made me.  I have not always been the best mom to him, he has definitely taken a back seat to the kids since they were born.  I hope I can make it up to him because I know he needs me now more than ever.

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